This evening my sister and I went to the cinema to go see the movie Brave. (That movie is amazing! If you haven’t seen it yet: go see it!) Afterwards, we thought the weather was way too nice to go home. The sun was going down, so it wasn’t that hot anymore, but it was still warm enough to walk outside without a jacket and a light breeze was blowing. Perfect! We went to sit down, with our feet in the water. (we have a lake next to the city)
The combination of a lot of drinks during the day, the salty popcorn and sitting at the water, got to me and I suddenly needed to go to the toilet badly. I simply went to the nearest café, since I was in a hurry. My sister stayed outside and I went to the waitress standing inside, near the door. The waitress was busy with her little electric devise, going over some orders. I never know how to politely let someone know that I want to start a conversation, so I usually just start one, hoping for the best. I asked: “Excuse me… May I use the toilet, please?”
Then… nothing. She didn’t blink, she didn’t nod, she didn’t say “Just a moment please”, she didn’t acknowledge me in any way. I said: “Erm… miss?” And she still didn’t say anything. Everything inside me panicked, as I had no idea what the waitress wanted me to do. Maybe she thought I was being rude, maybe I simply needed to wait, maybe she was deaf, maybe she didn’t hear me, maybe… My brain went in overdrive, trying to analyse what just happened.
I started to panic and looked over the waitress’ shoulder towards my sister and shrug my arms as to say: “What do I do?!” She shrugged her arms back and then calmly waved her hand downwards as if to say: “I have no idea, but maybe it’s best to just wait.”
About a minute later (which is long if you’re waiting for a response) the waitress looked up and said in a sharp tone, but with a smile: “YES miss… Can I help you??” I was startled by this very obvious fake politeness, which just seemed to scream “RUDE” at me. I decided to act like I didn’t notice, as I didn’t want to cause unnecessary trouble and asked again: “Yes, may I use the toilet, please?”
She started: “Well, generally we don’t allow people who aren’t costumers…” (This is freely translated. She said “In principe niet” which literally translated means “In principle not”, but I didn’t feel this was a proper translation.) To which I quickly, since I really needed to go, said: “I’m willing to pay?”
She frowned and answered: “I said GE-NE-RAL-LY, which means I’m allowing you to go, but next time please use the KFC or something.”
This startled me again. What was the need for all this rudeness? If at the beginning she simply answered; “Just a moment please” I would’ve just waited. If she just answered “Yes, you may, but just this once”, or “No, sorry, we don’t allow people who aren’t costumers, but you can maybe try the KFC?” then I would’ve simply gone to the KFC.
This is what happens when someone isn’t being clear about what they want from me. It gets me all confused and panicking and my mind will start going into overdrive, trying to figure out what is being asked from me and how I should respond and what that person might be thinking and so much more. Everything just turns into this big mess in my head and I won’t be able to come up with a proper answer in time anymore.
If anyone is wondering: Yes I did go to the toilet. After that, my sister and I went straight home, as I couldn’t enjoy that place anymore that evening and I got way too self-conscious. For the rest of the evening I just want to do some stuff on my laptop. Tomorrow’s another day. (This isn’t to say my whole day was bad. It was actually a very good day. I just wanted to tell what could happen if a situation isn’t being made clear.)