Sick and tired

"I'm sick and tired of always being sick and tired." This is what Anastacia sang in her song Sick and Tired and this is how I feel.

My whole life has been a fight for getting the help that I need. As most of you know, recently I've finally gotten the funding to get that help. I've already got some coaching, but I need more intensive help. This would come in the shape of a training for people with autism to learn to live on my own. I'd get my own room and there would be a shared living space with some other people with autism.

I've gotten a lot of information on the methods of this training, and it would've been perfect for me! We would start at the end of October.

You're probably wondering (if I haven't told you personally yet) why I'm talking in the past tense. Well, it might still happen somewhere in the future, but for now it's not. Some things, beyond the foundation's power, have happened that have caused them to postpone everything until the papers for the new location, where I would've ended up, are cleared. They have no idea when this will be, or if it will be at all. They have assured me, though, that if they can't make it happen, they'll look for another location.

This is all fine and dandy, and I'm very happy with them doing everything they can and with my current coach, but in the meanwhile I'm still not getting the full amount of help I need. Also, I've been granted the funding for three years, of which one is already almost over now. I hope I'll be able to be granted more time...

I'm not really angry at someone in particular, as these things are nobody's fault in particular. It's all due to certain unexpected circumstances. I am angry at the situation I'm being put in though. But how does one yell at a situation?

So all I got is a coach to keep things together and to wait while being sick and tired. And I'm just so sick and tired of always being sick and tired...